After years of searching, questioning, dating, and getting your heartbroken, you’ve finally found the person of your dreams. Your life together is amazing, and you’ve decided you’re ready to take the next step and get married! But if you’re in the LGBTQ+ community, you may find that wedding planning is a little more complicated than you’d planned.
There are several wedding traditions that may not work for you and your partner. Read on to learn more about how to plan an LGBTQ+ wedding that you’ll always remember as the best day of your life.
Churches That Perform LGBTQ+ Weddings
Many LGBTQ+ couples grew up in the church, believe in a higher power, or would like their wedding to be performed in a church. Unfortunately, many denominations still have discriminatory policies in place when it comes to same-sex weddings. There are, however, some churches that will allow LGBTQ+ couples to get married there.
The Christ Catholic Church, the Catholic Apostolic Church in North America, the United Catholic Church, the National Catholic Church of America, the Communion of Synodal Catholic Churches, and the White Robed Monks of St. Benedict all perform same-sex weddings.
LGBTQ+ couples can also get married in the Unitarian Universalist Association, the United Church of Christ, the Metropolitan Community Churches, the Episcopal Church, the Presbyterian Church, the Covenant Network of Presbyterians, the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, and the Baptist Peace Fellowship.
You can also find many Jewish temples and Muslim mosques that perform same-sex weddings.
Buying a Ring
The exchange of rings – especially engagement rings – is a tradition very much steeped in gender norms. If you’re in a same-sex relationship, you may both want to wear rings to symbolize your engagement, and what your wedding bands look like may be somewhat different. Some LGBTQ+ couples even choose to wear their wedding bands on a finger other than their left ring finger.
When shopping for a ring, consider going with your partner so you can pick out something both of you will love. It’s a good idea to make this one of your splurge areas when it comes to your budget; after all, your ring is the piece of your wedding that will last the longest. You may even want to look for a wedding band that shows your queer pride!
Organizing Your Wedding Party
Traditionally, wedding parties have consisted of bridesmaids on the bride’s side and groomsmen on the groom’s side. But in a same-sex wedding, this setup obviously won’t work. The good news is that your wedding party can look however you want it to – it’s all about who you want standing there next to you!
Many LGBTQ+ couples prefer to ask their closest loved ones to be in their wedding party, regardless of gender. You can each have a maid of honor or a best man if you like, and the roles of the ring bearer and flower attendant can be given to whoever fits the role. In fact, many couples prefer to have their pets take on this duty!
Picking Your Wedding Clothes
Wedding clothes are another tradition that often gets tossed out the window in LGBTQ+ weddings. While many grooms prefer to get married in tuxes and brides, like to wear white gowns, trans or genderqueer partners may not feel like those outfits work for them. The most important thing is that you wear something that makes you feel beautiful on your wedding day.
Armani, Kenneth Cole, and David’s Bridal are all supportive of LGBTQ+ couples and can help you find the perfect thing to wear on your wedding day. If you need a little more custom tailoring, talk to some local retailers in your area to see if they can help you. If their answers make you uncomfortable, there are online retailers who can work with you to find the perfect fit from the comfort of your own home.
Styling Your Hair
Aside from your outfit, your hair will be the center of attention on your wedding day. Whether you have long tresses or a short coif, you’ll want it styled to perfection. The key to a gorgeous wedding day hairstyle is to start your planning and prep work early.
If you plan to get your hair cut or dyed before the ceremony, plan to do it a week before the big day. Try out any products you plan to use on your wedding day beforehand, and do a dress rehearsal with the style to make sure it’s what you want. And give your hair plenty of conditioning love in the days leading up to your wedding, so it’s in great shape the day of.
Choosing Last Names
In traditional heteronormative relationships, brides have changed their last names to that of their new husband. This can be a nice tradition since it’s a lasting marker that you and your partner are one family unit. But in an LGBTQ+ couple, how do you decide who takes which name?
Many same-sex couples may choose to hyphenate their last names to show equality in the relationship. Others prefer to pick one partner’s name for both of them to take. Or you may choose an entirely new last name together – one popular option is to combine both of your last names into one new surname.
Plan Your LGBTQ+ Wedding
Marriage is a huge and exciting step, and your wedding day should be everything you’ve always dreamed it would be. While there are several traditional elements of a wedding that may not work for you and your partner, keep in mind that this day is all yours. Do what feels right for you and your partner, and look for LGBTQ-friendly vendors that will meet your needs with joy and acceptance.
If you’d like to start planning your LGBTQ+ wedding, check out the rest of our site at Blue Sky Atlanta. We have all the entertainment you need for the special day, from bands and DJs to magicians and more. Contact us today and discover the amazing talent we can bring to your wedding day.